Sunday, May 23, 2010

Mary Beth, Don't Go Away Mad... Mary Beth, Just GO AWAY!


Last Tuesday, Mary Beth Buchanan got... well... THUMPED here in PA4, and I haven't even been on to gloat celebrate.

I don't have an excuse. Demands on my time have, shall we say "evolved", and I'm still trying to adjust. But now that I have an extra minute or two, please allow me to say a respectful, sincere:


OK. Got that out of my system. (Yeah, right. I was practically dancing a jig around the living room on election night, and have found myself giddy at odd moments ever since. And if you don't grasp why, go read my piece about her when she announced for the race. This is a victory in more ways than one.)

Now it's on to November, and nothing more will be heard from my less-than-favorite former U.S. Attorney. Hopefully. From PA2010's coverage:

After delivering a concession speech and thanking her supporters, Buchanan hugged her husband and told him she’d have a second glass of wine.

Yep. Pour me one, too, Sweetheart! I don't drink... but for THIS, I'll make an exception!

A special "Thank You" to anyone who responded to my post and helped (or just went to learn about) her opponent, Keith Rothfus. He's been called a "true Tea Party conservative", and his win has saved me from voting for Altmire in the fall. I don't agree with the guy on everything, but he was the better candidate, and I'm glad he won. By a 2-1 margin, no less.

Looking forward to November, and hoping we see similar upsets all over America!

UPDATED to apologize...

I don't know what the hell is going on with my fonts. I've edited three times, and it keeps coming out all wonky. (No, I didn't have that wine. We'll blame Blogger.)

You're Gonna Need A Bigger... Kid?

I give up.

This post may represent the death of the "You're Gonna Need A Bigger Boat" bits. I can't see how to top this.

I saw this at (Yes, I read Don't you?) and I gotta be honest. I sorta want one. Not for my kids, but for me. It fits my sense of humor, if ya dig.
(Photo courtesy PatchTogether)

It's a shark sleeping bag. And it's available for the bargain basement price of $199 from Although I gotta be honest (again)... I'm a cheap ass by nature, and a $200 stuffed animal that I can sleep in probably isn't gonna happen.

From the product description (emphasis mine):

In an effort to make sharks (a very misunderstood animal that also happens to be one of my favorites) more cuddly, I designed and produced a prototype for the ChumBuddy.

See, that's where they screwed up. They wanted to make sharks "cuddly". Blech. If they'd gone for full-out realism with bloody teeth and all, I'd have had the Visa card out before common sense (or homicidal spouse) could have stopped me. But they had to get cutesy.

It almost reminds me of the TaunTaun sleeping bag from ThinkGeek. Except even though they went the kinda-cutesy route, they were smart enough to stay true to the film. (For those of you who don't remember, Luke slices open his trusty mount and sleeps in its guts to stay warm.) Check out the liner on the TaunTaun bag:

(Photo courtesy

Heh. See that? TaunTaun guts. Whoever invented the shark bag should have had a scuba fin sticking out of the teeth or something if they wanted my $200.

(No, I don't have the damn TaunTaun bag, either. I retain some sanity. Maybe. Or I just don't have enough disposable income to indulge my inner eight-year-old... You decide.)

VERY loosely related posts:
And looking at that list, I think I'm Gonna Need Some New Material....

Monday, May 10, 2010

You're Gonna Need A Bigger -- Ahhh Never Mind

Forget the boat.

I am at a rare loss for words.

Loosely related:

Peta Protects Pretend Pets

... or something.

So now we know what it takes to draw me out of hibernation. Peta.

No big shock there. I may have mentioned once or twice how I feel about Peta. But they're even more brain-cramp-inducing than even I imagined.

They've bullied convinced Facebook to take the pit bulls out of the game Mafia Wars.

Now, I don't play Mafia Wars. Or the farm thing. Or the fish thing. In fact, I rarely go to my personal page at all, and I pay zero attention to all the critters and weaponry and what have you that my so-called friends keep sending me. (If you're reading this and have sent me a fish or a hatchet or something... I'm sorry. But stop it. Seriously, I'm sick of scrolling past that crap when I make the mistake of thinking I'll spend five minutes checking on old friends.)

Anyway, I've seen other people play the game. And I know you win stuff that helps you progress or raise a level or whatever. The pit bulls are apparently one of those deals. But that's not the point. The point is... They. Are. Not. Real. Dogs.

I think veganism must affect the brain. Maybe all that Tofurkey and soy makes you... well... insane. These are not dogs. They are imaginary. They are little blips of electricity. They are -- never mind.

To add insult to injury, Peta announced it will be:

"...sending vegan chocolates to Zynga founder and CEO Mark Pincus to thank him for his compassionate decision."

GAH! Vegan chocolate? These people can ruin anything.