Saturday, October 10, 2009

Noble Puss Prize

So. Our esteemed leader has been awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.

This seems to have stunned the media, the blogosphere, and maybe President Obama himself. (Although, to be honest, I consider him too arrogant to be truly surprised by anyone giving him any award for anything.)

For the last 24 hours, there have been a lot of spoofs and other "awards" invented for Obama... some of them flat-out hilarious. My personal favorite might be (via an Ace of Spades commenter) nomination for the Heisman Trophy. I also enjoyed the ReasonTV announcement of his many other accomplishments.




But I have my own award in mind.

I believe President Barack Obama is truly worthy of a new award, one created in his very image, and with his singular political ideology in mind.

The Noble Puss Prize.

At the risk of offending the President, I checked the dictionary definitions to make sure my new award is named properly. Wouldn't want my own ignorance to in any way lessen the impact of his honorarium. So, per Dictionary.com:

Noble: (in part)
1. distinguished by rank or title.
2. pertaining to persons so distinguished.
3. of, belonging to, or constituting a hereditary class that has special social or political status in a country or state; of or pertaining to the aristocracy.
4. of an exalted moral or mental character or excellence; lofty: a noble thought.
5. admirable in dignity of conception, manner of expression, execution, or composition: a noble poem.
6. very impressive or imposing in appearance; stately; magnificent: a noble monument.
7. of an admirably high quality; notably superior; excellent.
8. famous; illustrious; renowned.

So far, so good. With the exception of being included in a hereditary class of aristocracy, every one of these points describes either President Obama or his perception of himself quite nicely.

Pussy: (In part):
5. Slang A man regarded as weak, timid, or unmanly.


Again, I think that hits exactly the note I was trying for. I've shortened it to "Puss". Call it poetic license.

NOW we have an award that fits. A prize for one who is distinguished by rank and title; who is considered (at least when he looks in the mirror) to be of exalted moral and mental character; who has repeatedly reminded us of his eloquence of expression; who is stately, magnificent, notably superior (again, at least in the mirror); and, of course, famous... our President the rock star. We have an award for the man who is all this and WEAK.

That's right. Weak. What has this man stood for since being elected? He's gone on a world-wide "We're sorry America sucks" tour. He has apologized for everything that might have slighted anyone in any other country ever. He has continually turned his back on our friends and allies while toadying up to despots and dictators and just plain dicks. The ONLY thing I can think of him standing up against is his own bad press! He's so weak, he's been nicknamed President Pantywaist by the Brits and President Thin-Skin by American bloggers.

Maybe I'm in the minority here, but I'd rather have a President who commands a little bit of respectful fear from the world than a thin-skinned pantywaist. But he's OUR thin-skinned pantywaist, and we're supposed to love him.

That is why, in the spirit of acknowledging our wondrous leader (and with a little Obama unapproved help from the dictionary) I have come up with his new award -- although as the kind of enemy he CAN'T stand up to, I realize I risk my piddly little blog being denounced by name at his next "Call 'em out!" press conference. Hell, that might be a faster way to get to a million blog hits than the 5 rules for "How to get a million hits on your blog in less than a year"! But, as we've been continually reminded, I have a duty to serve!

And so... I would like to serve up my special home-grown, non-astroturf award to our leader.

President Barack Obama -- 1st Annual Recipient (and at this rate, he's a favorite for the next three!) of the NOBLE PUSS PRIZE! ---applause may begin now.


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Thanks to GatewayPundit for the link!

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