"He would like it to be clear that the crime of bestiality occurs everywhere"

Sure it does...

But especially in West Virginia.

19 year old Mark Thompson was arrested and charged with kidnapping and killing a pygmy goat.  Oh yeah, he also sexually assaulted it.  He told officers he was high on bath salts, but the cops think he just really likes goats:

"The argument of bath salts is just an excuse...  There had to be an underlying desire there somewhere, and maybe the bath salts decreased the inhibitions enough to make it happen, but the bath salts is a cop out."

Well, from the look of him, I'm thinking maybe the cops are onto something.

High on bath salts with yer dick in a goat is no way to go through life, son.

Maybe bath salts can explain the hair...?